A letter to erdogan
Dear mr. president,
Please, please, please, whatever you do, don’t keep doing what you’re doing. It makes me look really bad. Like, really, really, bad. I don’t want to look bad in front of the entire world, so if you keep doing this then I’m going to have to tweet out very bad things and maybe do sanctions.
Actually, I will do sanctions and they will be the worst sanctions turkey has ever seen. But if you stop, then I will make sure to give you a little token of my appreciation in some way that’s totally legal and involves a 5 star golf resort I highly recommend.
Again, even though I’ve given you the green light and will do absolutely nothing to stop you, stop. I’m begging you. But also threatening you. Stop.
Yours most sincerely,
Donald J Trump