What's next on the distract us from your …


What’s next on the distract us from your impeachment list Mr. President? Asking for a friend

Hang on lemme check *calls area 51* hey, it’s the president, I’m gonna need that alien again for a couple hours… ok cool, thanks *hangs up* *calls Sean hannity*

What crimes are they impeaching trump for? I&r…


What crimes are they impeaching trump for? I’m really out of the loop and I haven’t heard of any evidence or crimes that he is getting impeached for.Abuse of power and obstruction of congress. The House of Representatives is expected to vot…

So I was spending time with my fiance. We were…


So I was spending time with my fiance. We were having lunch and we started talking about Trump’s impeachment hearings. Anyway, we decided that it would be cool to watch some YouTube clips about it. So he gave me his phone and I opened up the app. I was ready to search for clips when his search history came up. “Talcum powder fart prank”. My heart sank. And I’ve noticed that my baby powder has been running out a lot quicker than usual. I don’t know what to do.

Sue him for $130,000 and make him sign a non-disclosure agreement

mr president when we invade the french what ar…


mr president when we invade the french what are we going to do about their harsh stance against programmed obsolescence?Look, programmed obesity is one of my biggest concerns. We can’t allow people to just program other people, that’s wrong. And we’re …

mr president what is your stance on dogs being…


mr president what is your stance on dogs being able to voteCanines, or dogs as I like to call them, should absolutely be able to vote. And if they vote for me they should get a treat, and if they vote for Joe Biden they should get investigated for vote…

If this is real: Fuck you and your presidency….


If this is real: Fuck you and your presidency. It’s been a waste. If not real: Hey man, congrats on the blogIt is the year two thousand and nineteen, I have ran this blog for over 4 years, and people still don’t know whether or not I’m Donald Tru…

Any plans for this blog the day you are not pr…


Any plans for this blog the day you are not president sir?The day Donald trump is no longer president is the day I can finally stop posting to this god forsaken blog